Friday, August 29, 2008

Yayhooieeeeeee

8:36 a.m.
8/28/08

Wow seems inadequate. Woohoo seems completely understated. The only word that truly describes the day is Yayhooiee.

I am thrilled. And humbled. And a bit struck by the sheer way that God works. Only the night before, I was utterly disheartened. After working on a submission for a fellowship from the state Arts and Humanities Council, I received a nice but firm letter informing me that my work had not been chosen as the winner of the grant. I was heart broken. I'm not sure why. I knew there would be hundreds of other submissions and I was aware of how tight the competition would be. Still, I allowed myself to be too hopeful, too dream-filled and too starry-eyed. I was crushed when I tore that envelope open only to find that my work had been deemed not worthy.

It hurts when a door is slammed shut.

But it feels great when God opens another door with a quiet flourish that brings tears to the eyes and a fluttery feeling to the heart. And that's what He did -- the very next morning. I can't believe that it was a coincidence that a wonderful lady who belongs to the ACFW has been posting daily prayers for the past 40 days. Before going to bed the night I received the rejection, I begrudgingly read the day's posts and read her prayer. Even as I muttered and grumbled, the words she had typed touched my heart and gave me hope. I prayed that God would show me EXACTLY where I needed to head if He still wanted me to write.

And He did.

So, I'm once again anxious to go to the mailbox. Once again, it's enjoyable to sit at my new laptop and write. He gave me more than direction. He returned a valuable gift to me ... the gift of hoping, dreaming and reveling in a dream-come-true. And to that sweet woman whom I will never meet in person, but who cares enough to post the most beautiful and moving prayers, thank you.